Trip Report: Winstar Casino

Who: Me, Glenn Burr, Meghan Murphy, Scott Gussick, Kyle Lewis

Where: Winstar Casino in Thackerville, OK.

Never have so many traveled to smoke and drink soda.

Glenn thought it would be a good idea, since the weather has been so crappy, to take a road trip for some indoor fun. Since I've spent much of the past week sick in bed, I jumped a the opportunity.

Having never been there before I don't know if this is a normal occurrence or if there was something special about the 7-7-7 date, but this place was packed -- nut-to-butt. For those taking the GREs some time soon, this place is to dreary what the sun is to hot. This place is truly dreadful. It's as if someone transported Circus-Circus to Oklahoma, turned off half the lights and filled it with a less classy clientele but 100% more smoke. When I got home I walked by my smoke alarm and it blared instantly, and it doesn't even have a battery in it.

So what makes this "casino" the last place you should ever go to gamble. Three reasons:

1. NO BOOZE. How the mother of holy fuck do you put a casino in a place you can't even buy that abomination of 3.2 beer they have in OK? I thought it was crazy that there was a 2am "last call" at Foxwoods. It's real simple math: BOOZE + GAMBLING = HUGEPROFIT$. So, instead of booze, we see an ocean of sullen people smoking and sipping Dr Pepper.
2. 50¢ Ante for each hand of Blackjack: Apparently this an Oklahoma law, according to one dealer. Otherwise, I suspect, it's their way of making up for all the booze induced bad decisions people make at real casinos. I mean, if you're drunk enough, you'll do dumb shit like split 10s.
3. NO BOOZE.

In addition to the 3 casinos making up the Winstar, there was also a large smoke free poker room and bingo room. Additionally, there was an enclosed area in one of the casinos that housed the horse race book (no sports book). The horse race book and an unusual aroma that caused Meghan to remark that it smelled better at Lone Star Park. And there's fresh horseshit there.

Overall, I did have a good time. I won $35 (which would have been closer to $60 if not for tipping and those antes). But I think Lonestar Park or Shreveport are better options for semi-local gambling.