Blu-Ray Review: Terminator Salvation

 

I’ll be back.

Synopsis	A death row inmate from the past is resurrected in the future as an infiltrating terminator.  But his humanity ultimately saves the day.  Oh, and lots of shit blows up good.
What I Liked	CGI Arnold:  Maybe they should make one to replace the California governor.
What I Disliked	Cancer:  The movie starts with a death row inmate, moments away from execution, chatting with a cancer ravaged Helena Bonham Carter.  I guess it’s important we see she’s got the big C so that later, when we see her in the future, we’re blown out of our seats.  And the only reason she’s in the movie at all is so that she can provide.. Exposition:  The movie stops down near the climatic final battle so that HBC can explain to one of our heroes and the popcorn munching hoopleheads in the theater what’s going on and why it’s going on. Helena Bonham Carter:  Seriously, has she ever been in a good movie?  And don’t give me any of that Merchant Ivory/Shakespeare bullshit. Endless action sequences where technologically superior robots are defeated by our heroes.
Conclusion	It’s movies like this that make me want to fly to LA and kick Hollywood in the nutz.  Tedious CGIed up action sequence are strung together by a gossamer like plot.

• 1 breast
• dozens of mechanical beasts
• robot-fu
• redneck-fu

D

King Wally says “meh”