2010 In Review: 4 New Beers (and 1 wine)

5) King Wally’s Belgian Quad  --  A self-serving promotion of my barely competent brewing skeellz.  It’s light taste belies the powerful 12% abv it packs.  Certainly not as complex as most Belgian style ales, but it cost less than $3 a 22oz bottle. 
4) Pike Brewery Monk’s Uncle – To be fair, this beer probably doesn’t make the list except for the circumstances.  Time after time, no matter what was going on, the Pike Brewery was our #1 meet up place.  And why not – you can have a pretty decent Belgian Tripel for just $5.  In these hard economic times, a dollar saved on one beer can then later be applied to the next beer.
3) Jester King’s Wytchmaker Rye IPA – If you like hops and then more hops with an additional helping of hops on top of more hops, this is your beer.
2) Avery’s Depuceleus --  Apparently the name refers to  a woman that deflowers men.  I have no response to that, but to say this is the tastiest beer I may have ever had.  When the cicerone at The Meddlesome Moth described it as a Lambic aged in zinfandel casks with cherries, I was expecting something sickeningly sweet like a Framboise.  This was a delicately balance sour beer with just the right amount of cheery.  Avery made a painfully limited supply of this beer.  So if you didn’t get to try it, well, maybe in another life.
1) Love & Squalor Pinot Noir – I’ll just plagiarize my review of the Farm Café – “Although a bit on the sweet side, it was full of great noiry flavor and the aroma was amazing.  It may be the one wine I would rather smell than drink but not because it tastes bad.  It just smells that good.”

2010 In Review: Top 5 New Restaurants

Most of these restaurants are not new, only new to me in 2010.

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5) Oceanaire – This is a late entry.  Great service, great food, sustainable sea bass – what more do you need?  How about a flight of oysters.  Yeah, it’s a chain, but so is Morton’s.  If a chain can maintain a high level of food quality and service it’s going to get much love from me.

4) Pink Door – I know the food was good here and there was a chick on a trapeze.  But dinner here will always be remembered for meeting the boisterous Claire and her stories of getting high and stealing a pizza oven. 

3) The Farm Café – The restaurant that provided the finest dessert (Blackberry bread pudding) and the finest wine (Love & Squalor Pinot Noir) of 2010.  The rest of the food was top notch and their Veggie hamburger was on The Best Thing I’ve Ever Eaten as that pie faced cake maker’s favorite burger.

2) Elliot’s Oyster House – Quite simply the tastiest oysters ever along with other treats from the sea.  Almost as impressive as the food is the knowledge of the waitstaff.

1) Uchi/Uchiko –  Although overall I prefer Uchi to Uchiko, I lumped them together.  Once I win the lottery, I’ll be going a lot more.  Three of my top 10 dishes are from the geniuses behind these restaurants.

Area Husky Exhibits Winter Doldrums

Shepherd's Pie

It came out beautifully.  So I had to share.

2010 In Review: Top 10 Dishes

Since all I really know about is stuffing my face, my 2010 in Review posts will be largely food-centric.  Please to enjoy.

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10) Wok Fried Sea Bass @ 560 – A whole fucking sea bass is fried and then brought to your table to be meticulously torn apart.  Be sure they let you have the extra crispy edges.

9) Smoked Salmon @ TJ’s Seafood Market – So delicious we’ve dubbed it candy. 

8) The Usual @ Cuquita’s – Consists of Queso Flameado, Super Nachos and Chilaquiles.  It’s really three dishes, but you really have to have them all together to satisfy the Cuquita’s craving that reaches to to the depths of your soul.  It’s an orgy of cheese and chorizo, but in a good way.

7) Gyutan (Grilled Beef Tongue) @ Uchiko – I’m not sure I had anything with a beefier flavor in 2010 and that includes a porterhouse at Morton’s.

6) Blueberry Bread Pudding @ The Farm Café – I’ve had a lot of bread pudding pass through my pudding hole.  But none has ever been as good as this.  So fresh blueberryy and puddingy.

5) Parrot Fish @ Dallas Fish Market – The best piece of fish I had all year.  It was early in 2010, so I’m not sure how it was prepared.  But the experience stayed with me, and deserves a high ranking.

4) Mac & Cheese @ Breecher’s Handmade Cheese – So good it’s one of Oprah’s favorite things.  So if you don’t believe me, believe her. 

3) Effingham Inlet Oysters @ Elliot’s Oyster House – I had a lot of oysters in Seattle from all over the Pacific Northwest.  But it’s the Effingham Inlet oysters that I crave to this day.  Nothing has ever tasted so deliciously of the sea as these gems.

2) Bacon Sen @ Uchi – This is so good I had it twice and both times they were for dessert.  Not because it’s sweet, but because it’s a satisfying end of a meal.

1) Foie Gras Nigiri @ Uchi  -- You know you’re in for something special when the waiter advises to take several bites of the “sushi” because it’s so rich.  If only I had known of it’s greatness so that I could take even smaller bites to make the experience last longer.

Another Reason to be Proud of New Jersey

or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Third Helping of Mashed Potatoes.
Donna Simpson's feast: The 30,000-calorie Christmas feast eaten by the world's fattest mum in ONE two-hour sitting | Mail Online

Make a Breakfast Fortress, to Keep out All the Haters

Facebookers go here for the awesomest breakfeast evar..

Live Blogging NFL Week 17: Cowboys @ Eagles

I’m only doing this for Jason and to get my blog numbers up from 2010.  That can’t be hard since I only had 87 in 2010 and most of those were silly Amazon gift ideas. 

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This week's live blogging is brought to you by:

The letter Z	and by the number 7

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Pregame

Does anyone know if this is the first time an Aggie quarterback has started a game in the NFL?  Did Bucky Richardson ever start with the Oilers? 

Well, it turns out Bucky started four games in 1994 with a passer rating in the low 50s.  So I’m going to say this is the first time an Aggie passing quarterback has ever started a game in the NFL.

And let’s all pray to sweet clean baby jebus that the Cowboys don’t screw up and win this game and thus ruin their draft positioning.

Q1

13:35:  McGee to Austin for a 30+ yard gain on a screen.  The first two plays went to Jones for nothing or a loss.   What happened to Felix.  The Philly D is littered with taxi squad players and he can’t make a move for just a little gain?

12:30: Handoff to Jones for 12.   See, all I have to do is dog a player and he shows improvement.  Once I stopped doing these live blogs and thus stopped dogging Roy Williams, he returned to form.

11:50:Choice on the Wildcat, gain of 4.  Please stop this nonsense.  I want to see more Choice, but not if it means more wildcat.  And, yes, I know they call it the Razorback with Choice.

11:18:  End-around to Austin, loss of 9.  Two trick plays in a row for a total loss of 5.  This game means nothing.  Let’s see what McGee can do and stop with the tricks.

6:28:  Handoff to Choice for 1.  Three handoffs in a row to start the Cowboys’ second possession.  Again, what does this prove?  Let’s see what McGee can do!  Everybody now.  Let’s see what McGee can do!

4:10:  McGee sacked, loss of 7.  Hey, at least they let him do something.  But he needs to learn to get rid of  the ball sooner.  Hopefully he has learned his lesson.

3:50:  McGee to MartyB, gain of 3.  Aggie on Aggie action.  Hot!

2:53:  McGee with an Intentional Grounding penalty.  Again, I would rather see this than another three yard handoff to Jones.

At the end of the quarter, it’s a scintillating nil to nil draw.  How do you like my soccer speak?

 

Q2

14:53:  Touchdown Eagles.  Kolb to Hall on First and Goal on the 4.  Phil 7  Dal 0

14:47:  Handoff to Jones for 20.  Keep running this play.  Geez, offensive coordinating isn’t that tough.  Now call the touchdown play and we’re back in it.

13:40:  Wildcat with Choice for a gain of 1.  Guh.

13:05:  I’m now convinced that Garret wants McGee to fail.  You can see he’s a big nervous about his protection.  He’s looking at blitzers more than his receivers.  So what does the red Genius do – Empty Backfield. 

11:28:  Touchdown Cowboys.  Spencer causes Kolb to fumble, picked up by Ware for TD.  Dal 7  Phil 7. 

6:20:  Handoff to Jones, no gain.  Guh.

4:58:  McGee to Manny Johnson, gain of 8.  Who??  It was a nice throw on to Johnson in coverage.  But not enough for a first down.

0:34:  Ware sacks Kolb.  I’m only blogging defensive plays in which Ware does something big, it appears.

0:23:  McCann muffs the punt.  Giggle.

0:17:  Ware sacks Kolb.  This may push the Eagles out of FG range.

0:09: Ware hurries Kolb to throw out of bounds.  This should have been a grounding penalty.

0:00 INT by Sensabaugh on the hail mary into the endzone.

At the half, Dallas 7  Philadelphia 7.

 

During halftime, please visit my fine sponsor, Amazon.com.  Of course if you’re the douchebag that begged me to do this live-blogging you’re reading this from your douchebag RSS reader and don’t see my sponsor banners.

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Q3

13:00:  I look foreword to not having to witness Keith Brookings’ terrible coverage, bad penalties and obnoxious pregame rants next year. 

12:08:  INT Terrance Newman.

12:02:  Handoff to Jones for 14.  Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

10:47;  32 Yards from McGee to Austin.  See, just give him a chance to make a play.

10:19:  Dropped pass by Choice.  MUST BE CAUGHT!

10:14:  McGee to Williams, gain of 6.  Roy is still playing?

9:33:  McGee to Austin too low.  Over on downs.  Oh well.

6:36:  The ridiculousness of this game is causing me to lose enthusiasm for this live blogging.  Each team at this point has 7 points and 6 punts. 

4:44:  McGee to Williams, dropped.  The amazingly inept hands of Roy Williams.  That pretty much epitomizes his career as a Cowboy.

3:35:  McGee on a QB keeper for a first down.  The kid is playing hard.  It’s not going to be for lack of effort on his part that Dallas loses.  Lack of ability, perhaps. But that can come with more practice.

3:00:  Wildcat again.  Guh, again.

Another exciting nil-nil quarter.  Dallas 7  Philadelphia 7.

Q4

15:00;  Can we have a running clock for the rest of the game??

14:55:  Hatcher sacks Kolb to force a FG attempt.

14:25:  FG Eagles.  43 yards by Akers.  Phil 10  Dal 7.

14:09:  McGee to MartyB on a deflection by Jones.  First down.  I like how Garret gets Jones involved in the offense in innovative ways.

11:46:  McGee on a QB keeper, gain of 12 – first down.  Wow.  He’s having trouble make accurate throws right now, but McGee is busting his ass trying to keep the chains moving.

10:30:  I also look forward to not see MB3 rumble and stumble for a gain of 1 next year.

9:45:  Buehler misses from 52 yards.  What exactly is his range?  At least he’s consistent.  He misses from close and from far.

9:34:  Kolb to Hall for a bazillion yards.  How do you let the little white guy behind you?  I’m looking at you TNew.

7:01:  FG Eagles.  22 yards by Akers.  Phil 13  Dal 7.

1:28:  McGee to Witten for 32 yards.  What great effort by JWitt.

0:55:  TD Cowboys.  McGee to Witten.  Dal 14 Phil 13.  Buehler makes the PAT.

0:55:  Okay.  The Cowboys are on the verge of fucking this thing up and winning and dropping in the draft.  Hopefully the defense will do what they’ve done all year and give up a huge play late in the game.

0:50: Ware sacks Kolb for the third time.  That’s not a good start for a high draft pick.

0:32:  INT TNew to seal the deal.  I guess it’s better for Jerry to fuck up a middle of the first round pick than a top of the first round pick. 

Well, I’m glad that’s over with.  Join me this Spring when I live blog the entire season of the Western Conference Champion FC Dallas.  Is that even correct?  Do they have conferences in MSL?  And how many games is that?  Oh, good Christ what have I agreed to.

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2010 Resolutions: How It Went

Meh

Some of my resolutions I knocked out of the park and others I took a huge O-fer.

• Read 10 Books – Well I probably started at least 10 books, I just didn’t finish many.  I used to read dozens of books a year.  Now I’m not sure I read that many in a decade.  Books I did read, In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks: . . . And Other Complaints from an Angry Middle-Aged White Guy , The Big Short: Inside the Doomsday Machine and The Sommelier Prep Course: An Introduction to the Wines, Beers, and Spirits of the World
• Attend 10 Shows – I’m pretty sure I achieved this one, or at least came close with the highlights including Roger Waters and Avenue Q.
• 10 Movies – I’m proud to say I have not seen one movie in a theater in 2010.  I think that makes it official, I don’t like movies.  The time commitment is to large and they seldom deliver anything close to entertainment.
• 10 New Restaurants – I probably did this in the Pac Northwest alone.  Notable new restaurants include Elliot’s Oyster House in Seattle, Oceaniare  and 560 in Dallas and Pok Pok and Farm Café in Portland.
• 10 New Dishes – this one was easy.  Not only did I make at least 10 new dishes from recipes, I also started making things up I thought should work and also started smoking large hunks of meats thus requiring a 2011 purchase of a Big Green Egg.
• 10 Days Outside the US – nope.  Didn’t make it to Vancouver or Montrael.  I didn’t even make it to Paris Las Vegas.  Fail!
• 10 Things Outside my Comfort Zone – semifail.  I’m pretty sure I did a couple of things outside my comfort zone.  Just nothing worth blogging about. 
• 10 lbs per Quarter – probably a bit of an overreach.  Probably lost 10 lbs for the year.  So not a complete fail.

I think this is a good set of resolutions.  So let’s try it again.  But this year they go to 11.  Except for movies.  I’m going to try to go the entire decade without seeing a movie.

Mr. Plinket Gives Us An Hilarious New Years Gift

The Episode III review.
Facebookers can go here for the hahas.

And even if it’s a bad movie, that doesn’t mean you wouldn’t want a copy to complete your DVD collection.

I don't know why the enormously greedy George Lucas hasn't released these on Blu-Ray yet.

I’m So Embarrassed for You

[ed note -- the doldrums were worse than first thought. this was written back in late November and is only now being posted.  So please be so kind as to pretend it’s Thanksgiving and you haven’t seen endless clips of this on The Soup or Jimmy Kimmel.]
I’m sorry I haven’t posted in a while. After over three years of doing this, I sometimes get tired of my own “voice”.  So it would have to take something monumental to get me out of the doldrums of the boredom that is my inner voice to get me back into blogging.  And I witnessed something yesterday that was shocking, revolting and made me cry for the future of our society.
That thing was Oprah’s Favorite Things.
First of all, I want to make it clear that this has little to do with Oprah.  It may not be a popular stance amongst the hipster snark-filled blogerati, but I think Oprah is an inspirational example of the greatness of America.  This is a person who climbed up from abject poverty in the racist south to becoming the most powerful black woman in the history of ever.   And to me, that’s what America is all about – a dedicated focus on your objectives and you can achieve anything despite all obstacles.
No, this posting is aimed at the cackling, sycophantic yentas that populated Oprah’s audience on the occasion of her announcing her favorite things.  I swear to Christ, fewer tears were shed during 9/11.  These shallow coozes reacted to being given a brownie pan like their leukemia suffering toddler had just been given a miracle cure.  The looks of shock and awe on their faces would make you think they were peering at the face of Christ himself and not a fucking cashmere sweater with matching cable throw whatever the fuck that is.
Now, to be fair, I have had the Beecher’s Mac & Cheese in Seattle.  And it is pretty fucking good.  But I would not react to being given a frozen dinner version of it in the same way as winning the Powerball Lottery.
And, as we head into the dreaded Xmas season, I wonder why we are so infatuated with crap.  I seldom go to malls anymore.  Why should I when there’s the greatness of Amazon.  (So if you need a cashmere sweater, follow this link  Merona® Women's Cashmere Cardigan Sweater - Oxygen Blue and do me a solid and buy something.  These rants aren’t free, ya know.)