Showing posts with label twitter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label twitter. Show all posts

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Neko Case Brings the Funny to 2012

Vermont resident, New Pornographers band member, Twitter savant and frequent participant in this blogger’s most deviant of fantasies, Neko Case has started out 2012 burning up Twitter with her comedy stylings.  Please to enjoy:

 

 

 

 

 

  • 2011, you tried to be as shitty as 2010 and failed! Which makes you even more pathetic! Good riddance you soul sucking troll!
  • ***all tweets represent the personal grievances and disappointments of miss case. Happy new year to the rest of you. Xo
  • 2011.Feel like I just got out of the State Penn and now I'm gonna go hang at a random laundry mat. I have just enough cash to bleach myself.
  • In other words, I was roughly finger-banged by the mayonnaise-y, frat-boy hands of 2011.
  • Time to change out of this unflattering robe and into a animal print snuggie. 2012 is about comfort and embracing my "benign gender" status.
  • My vagina is now the lint catcher in my dryer! #Genderbenign2012
  • I was just kidding about my vagina! It's right over there in front of the fridge drinking milk straight out the carton!

 

Although the funniest Tweet of the day:

 

Scotty L. @MarylandMudflap -- Already broke my resolution: I killed a drifter.

Monday, August 8, 2011

Twitterer of the Week

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This week’s Twitterer of the Week is another bawdy, blustery broad (yeah, I may have  a type).  A Canadian Indie Rock legend (if Canadian Indie Rock can have legends) and now a member of the The New Pornographers.  This week’s Twitterer of the Week is:

@NekoCase

I discovered her originally in the mid oughts on an Indie music channel on the Yahoo Radio that used to be on Messenger.  I immediately was mesmerized by her voice.

A sampling of her tweets:


The next person who tells me "Go Vegetarian" I'm going to fucking eat YOU! I don't harass you. Leave me the FUCK ALONE!

The open drain/sewer gas access feature of my hotel room is fancy!! I am transported to ancient Rome!

If you ever hear me sing in that quirky, sickening, wounded, "Baby Alive" radio voice, please kick me in the Vag with a boot made of rasps.

@glttrgrrl @kirkland24 I work hard at NOT eating my dogs. They look like twinkies and smell like fresh baked bread and fritos.

@cram_mandible Come up with some opinions and TV catch phrases of your own, and let me make jokes about fucking beef jerky.

Happy Friday everybody! It's shower-time!!! I am a SKANK!

@ChrisRRegan The U.S. Never paid me back for that abortion.

Group of dudes hogging a big section of chairs to play D n'D. They are not giving 2 shits what the cool kids think about this. I love them.

Why do women cut their hair into the "Kate plus 8" hairdo? Did they just give up?!

Oh, lady with GIANT boobs running through the airport, I am so sorry. (and my chest hurts sympathetically)

The airport is the underside of humanity's balls.

I'm a dude, by the way. I've just decided.

I've been a dude for years,but if feels good to just say it out loud. I'm going to go change the batteries in some guitar pedals. #Mantime

I LOVE being a dude. I never have to have, look at, think about, hear about painting or talk about "fingernails" EVER. Blissed-out.


Her solo


And with The New Pornographers

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Twittererer of the Week

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I’m not really sure this will be a weekly feature.  After all, I don’t have a strong track record on maintaining weekly features.  But this week’s Twittererer of the week has had me rolling and inspired me, for at least this week, to start a weekly feature.

This week’s Twittererer of the week is:

@thecheapbastard

The Dallas Observer’s bawdy cheap food critic and James Beard Award nominee, Alice Laussade

With WFAA’s Pete Delkus on vacation this week, @thecheapbastard has assumed the responsibility of tweetering about the weather.  Some fine examples this week:

 

Today's forecast: Sunny skies and a high of fuck your face. #substituteweatherer

EXCLUSIVE : Hurricane Don finishes early, worries about reputation. #substituteweatherer

BREAKING: Arlingtonionites will sell boob for rain. RT @MedlinnieI: I'd do anything for some rain right now. #substituteweatherer

Fuck. All. That. RT: @CBSLarryagree! RT @marygaverykemp: if it's gonna be 100 next week I prefer the streak continue #substituteweatherer

That's like saying, "If I'm gonna get stabbed in the dick every day next week, I might as well get stabbed today, too." #substituteweatherer

Balls! http://t.co/QipmTch

Clouds, you are sucking at life right now. Fuckin' lazy. #getittogether #substituteweathererhttp://t.co/0KsMjTf

Hey Tropical Storm Don, Dallas has good barbecue and titties. You should visit. #substituteweatherer @wfaaweather

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